I used to look forward to Friday’s. I loved reflecting on my working week. What went well, what didn’t, what new things I learnt, what new connections I’d made, people I’d met, things I could take forward, new and inspiring ideas….you get my meaning.
My Friday’s now consist of what could I have done better, why my battle to do everything 110% takes so much energy out of me I could sleep for a year. Why my perfectionism is tested to its limits because I am naturally a very methodical, hard-working, challenge absorbing type of person. I love what I do and I HATE that I can’t do what I love with ease anymore. I then look towards the weekend hoping I can gain enough recovery to make the next week better than the last. It never works.
I remember when I attended the Chronic Pain Services last year and I already knew about ‘pacing’. I didn’t believe in it and I still don’t now. It’s fine if you’re not working full-time, but it does not work with full-time employment. End of story. Feel free to challenge that, but I would only really listen to those in full-time work who have been able to pace themselves.
Friday for me is not Friday, it’s the same as any other day, so does that mean I don’t look forward to any day? I guess not.